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ISSUE 172

Self-Image Audit

All that you touch, you Change. All that you Change Changes you.
Octavia E. Butler, Parable of the Sower

Hi dear friend!

At work, Q4 has officially entered our WhatsApp chats.

Which means Q3 gets reviewed: results, projections, what worked, what didn’t, where we were too optimistic, where something outperformed expectations. And while listening to all of that during our weekly meeting, I had a thought: we are very good at auditing performance and surprisingly bad at auditing ourselves.

And no, I am not talking about it in a “How can I improve?” way. More like “Is the story I keep telling about myself even up to date?” Because some identities have remarkable staying power. Meanwhile, the evidence may have moved on years ago.

So what happens when your life changes faster than your self-image does?

Until next week,
Veronica Joce,
Senior Editor at Intelligent Change

Ideas for Reflection

Is your identity lagging?

Psychologist Elizabeth Mateer recently introduced the term identity lag to describe the gap between how quickly your life can change and how slowly your internal picture of yourself catches up. Your title can change in a day. Your habits can change over a year. Your circumstances can change completely. But the version of you in your own head may still be working from older information.

Let me paint a picture for you. You get promoted but still feel junior. You become good at something but continue introducing yourself as someone who’s “not really good at it.” You change your body but still dress for the old one. You leave a difficult chapter but keep responding as though you’re still inside it. Sounds familiar, doesn’t it?

The facts and the person changed. The story didn’t.

So what if some of the things you call insecurity, lack of confidence, or “just who I am” are simply old conclusions that haven’t been reviewed in a while? Your self-image is built from evidence. But unlike a Q3 report, nobody automatically refreshes the data.

And if that’s true, the question changes from “Who do I need to become?” to “Who have I already become that I haven’t fully noticed yet?”

Let’s keep talking. Leave your question here

Getting Things Done

Conduct a self-image audit

Sometimes growth happens before recognition. You may already have become the person you’re trying to become, you just haven’t noticed it. Again, yet. So let’s check.

Complete the following sentence with statements about yourself. Do it five times and try not to overthink it.
I am someone who…
Then look at each statement and ask:
According to what evidence? And from when?

For example:

“I’m terrible with money.”
Is that still true, or is this data from age 20?

“I never stick with anything.”
What evidence from the past year says otherwise?

“I’m not athletic.”
Based on how active you are now, or on school PE?

“I don’t make friends easily.”
Whose observation was that? And when?

Then split the page in two:
OLD DATA (The story I’ve been telling myself).
NEW DATA (What my actual life says now).

Want to take the audit further? The Life Designer Journal goes deeper into who you are and the beliefs that may be limiting you. Think of it as the research phase before you approve the next version of your life.

In The Spotlight

Your internal memo needs an update

You wouldn’t make a Q4 decision using numbers from 2024, right? So why keep making decisions about yourself using evidence from then? If your default has been I always give up, but the last two years are full of evidence that you keep going, that old belief probably shouldn’t still be running the whole department.

Use Mindful Affirmations to bring in new language, new perspective, and a more current version of the story you tell yourself about who you are.

Update the internal narrative →

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29:T1d94,[SHOP](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections) [NEW ARRIVALS](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/new) [READ](https://www.intelligentchange.com/blogs/read) ISSUE 172 Self-Image Audit All that you touch, you Change. All that you Change Changes you. Octavia E. Butler, Parable of the Sower Hi dear friend! At work, [Q4](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/productivity/products/quarterly-productivity-planner) has officially entered our WhatsApp chats. Which means Q3 gets [reviewed](https://www.intelligentchange.com/products/best-year-journal-oat): results, projections, what worked, what didn’t, where we were too optimistic, where something outperformed expectations. And while listening to all of that during our weekly meeting, I had a thought: we are very good at auditing performance and surprisingly bad at [auditing ourselves.](https://www.intelligentchange.com/products/best-year-journal-black) And no, I am not talking about it in a “How can I improve?” way. More like “Is the story I keep telling about myself even up to date?” Because some identities have remarkable staying power. Meanwhile, the evidence may have moved on years ago. So what happens when your life changes faster than your self-image does? Until next week, Veronica Joce, Senior Editor at Intelligent Change Ideas for Reflection Is your identity lagging? Psychologist Elizabeth Mateer recently introduced the term [identity lag](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-architecture-of-identity/202608/identity-lag-why-self-image-updates-slower-than-your) to describe the gap between how quickly your life can change and how slowly [your internal picture of yourself](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/journals/products/life-designer-journal) catches up. Your [title](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/productivity/products/quarterly-productivity-planner) can change in a day. Your [habits](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/digital-products/products/ultimate-digital-reflection-bundle) can change over a year. Your circumstances can change completely. But the version of you [in your own head](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/journals/products/the-stoic-journal) may still be working from older information. Let me paint a picture for you. You get promoted but still feel junior. You become good at something but continue introducing yourself as someone who’s “not really good at it.” You change your body but still dress for the old one. You leave a difficult chapter but keep responding as though you’re still inside it. Sounds familiar, doesn’t it? The facts and the person changed. The story didn’t. So what if some of the things you call insecurity, lack of confidence, or “just who I am” are simply old conclusions that haven’t been reviewed in a while? Your self-image is built from [evidence.](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/journals/products/becoming-a-warrior-journal) But unlike a Q3 report, nobody automatically refreshes the data. And if that’s true, the question changes from “Who do I need to become?” to “Who have I already become that I haven’t fully noticed yet?” [Let’s keep talking. Leave your question here](https://intelligentchange.typeform.com/ask-veronica) Getting Things Done Conduct a self-image audit Sometimes [growth](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/journals/products/best-year-journal-green) happens before recognition. You may already have become the person you’re trying to become, you just haven’t noticed it. Again, yet. So let’s check. - Complete the following sentence with statements about yourself. Do it five times and try not to overthink it. I am someone who… - Then look at each statement and ask: According to what evidence? And from when? For example: “I’m terrible with [money](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/mindful-affirmations/products/mindful-affirmations-finance).” Is that still true, or is this data from age 20? “I never [stick](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/productivity/products/productivity-planner) with anything.” What evidence from the past year says otherwise? “I’m not [athletic](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/journals/products/five-minute-journal-fit).” Based on how active you are now, or on school PE? “I don’t [make friends](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/play/products/get-closer-table-talk) easily.” Whose observation was that? And when? - Then split the page in two: OLD DATA (The story I’ve been telling myself). NEW DATA (What my actual life says now). Want to take the audit further? [The Life Designer Journal](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/journals/products/life-designer-journal) goes deeper into who you are and the beliefs that may be limiting you. Think of it as the research phase before you approve the next version of your life. In The Spotlight Your internal memo needs an update You wouldn’t make a Q4 decision using numbers from 2024, right? So why keep making decisions about yourself using evidence from then? If [your default](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/mindful-affirmations/products/chakra-affirmations) has been I always give up, but the last two years are full of evidence that you keep going, that [old belief](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/journals/products/life-designer-journal) probably shouldn’t still be running the whole department.Use [Mindful Affirmations](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/mindful-affirmations/products/mindful-affirmations) to bring in new language, new perspective, and a more current version of the story you tell yourself about who you are. [Update the internal narrative →](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/mindful-affirmations/products/mindful-affirmations) https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections Enjoyed this newsletter? Send it to a friend. Was Intelligent Weekly forwarded to you from a friend? If so, you can [sign up for more here.](https://manage.kmail-lists.com/subscriptions/subscribe?a=nFEe3R&g=VU8Fit) Live a full life. Leave a small footprint. Sustainable routines begin with sustainable practices. We use only natural, recycled, and biodegradable materials and are committed to donating a portion of our profits, products, and time to causes around the world. No longer want to receive these emails? [Unsubscribe](https://manage.kmail-lists.com/subscriptions/unsubscribe?a=nFEe3R&c=01KZ99X65ARHRBGY8RV0KV96P2&k=1812e5855e552d6853aed33342fc29dd&se=intelligentchange%40mailspo.com&m=01M28EV67A3GAJJGDCXJ7S2EG3&r=01M30PRSX7N8H1V8EYXHGZ9WTP) or [Manage Preferences](https://manage.kmail-lists.com/subscriptions/update?a=nFEe3R&c=01KZ99X65ARHRBGY8RV0KV96P2&k=1812e5855e552d6853aed33342fc29dd&se=intelligentchange%40mailspo.com&m=01M28EV67A3GAJJGDCXJ7S2EG3&r=01M30PRSX7N8H1V8EYXHGZ9WTP) Intelligent Change 8 The Green, STE 400 Dover De 19901, United States [Five Minute Journal App Store](https://apps.apple.com/in/developer/intelligent-change-llc/id1556875886) [Five Minute Journal App Google Play Android](https://play.google.com/store/apps/developer?id=Intelligent+Change+LLC&pli=1) [Instagram](https://www.instagram.com) [Tiktok](https://www.tiktok.com/@intelligentchange?lang=en) [Pinterest](https://www.pinterest.co.uk/intelligentchange/) [LinkedIn](https://www.linkedin.com/company/intelligentchange) [YouTube](https://www.youtube.com/@intelligentchange) 1f:["$","article",null,{"className":"min-w-0 flex-1 overflow-hidden","aria-label":"Issue #172: Self-Image Audit","children":[["$","$L26",null,{"emailId":"b058df0d-0fed-4583-b1a2-754132d9c731"}],["$","$L27",null,{"email":{"id":"b058df0d-0fed-4583-b1a2-754132d9c731","subject":"Issue #172: Self-Image Audit","previewText":"[SHOP](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections)\n[NEW ARRIVALS](https://www.intelligentchange.com/collections/new)\n[READ](https://www.intelligentchange.com/blogs/read)\n\nISSUE 172\n\nSelf-Image Audit\n\nAll that you touch, you Change. All that you Change Changes you.\nOctavia E. 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